An apology to Campbell’s Soup for borrowing their catch phrase, but it seemed to fit for my M day. Of course, I could begin with the obvious – MS – but I’d prefer not to give it special recognition.
This is another of the vocabulary words my students learned. It means a surge, rapids or riptide. I sometimes view my past ten years that way. When life was fairly normal and settled as calm waters, along came this ‘maelstrom,’ and I was thrown into the white waters of this disease. I could no longer navigate with my little raft and oar; now I needed a life line to get me to shore. There are still days when I feel this way, and I struggle to stay on the surface of this raging tide. I definitely can’t remove the life jacket.
This is how I view my future – a total mystery. Well, in essence, we are all alike in this since no one knows what lies ahead. I would still be more comfortable, though, if I was facing this unknown entity as an able-bodied person. If I had a little cushion of knowing I could respond physically to demands, I might not find the mysterious future so threatening. If I had had longer in the working world to save more financially, I wouldn’t live in constant worry. If I knew then what I know now when I was younger…
Did you know that my nickname means to blunder, bungle, spoil, mess, and fumble. I received this moniker years ago, and it had nothing to do with these synonyms! My husband called me Muffie before we were married, and it stuck. Soon, my family members began calling me that, and my sister still calls me that, while my nephew adds the Aunt before it. I’ve often seen it used as a preppy name, and a friend of mine, whose nickname was Biff, used to laugh that it fit our fashion style. Now, it’s mostly online that I use it. Yet I laugh at the real meaning – boy does it fit!
I’m not sure if they’re in vogue or not, but I love things that are monogrammed. I had stationery with flowery letters intertwined, but now I just type letters, so I can create my own coat of arms as needed. Years ago, it was popular to have circular or oval pins with monograms, and I have two of them (sitting in my jewelry box.) I have various pieces that have my maiden initial – C – emblazoned on them, and I’m often asked why. [It was traditional to use the maiden name, as girls had pieces before they chose a husband. These items were often part of the girls’ dowries.] I inherited items from my aunt and grandmother, so they have my maiden initial on them. I even used to embroider a monogram on sweaters when I could still wield a needle and thread.
Do I believe in them? Why, yes, yes I do! It’s all I have going right now. I see little in the way of ‘cure’ being discussed in the news, so I have to hold on to the idea that a miracle could occur and I’d be normal again. The likelihood of this happening is scant, but I still pray for it, and I try to keep my belief going. I’ve often said that I’m not big on ‘hope,’ but I think believing in miracles might be the same thing.
I know there are millions of m words that I haven’t touched, but I go with what comes to mind. Then I run out of space!